Weekly PD: Simple Pleasures

Last weekend our very dear family friends, Aunt Joann and Uncle Scott came to visit us and as always, they came bearing gifts for our Little Darlings. Our eldest darling opened up her package and squealed with excitement, "I've never had a jump rope before!" The deal was that if she ate all her dinner, we would go out together and I would teach her how use her new gift. She lived up to her end of the bargain and under the light of the stars (and a flood light) I taught my daughter how to jump rope. I showed her how to hold the handles and as I demonstrated the process, I could feel my inner child swell with excitement and a huge smile spread across my face. I could feel the flush of the blood in my cheeks and as I handed over the jump rope to my daughter I felt more alive than I had in quite some time. Watching her delight in the fun of it all was just as satisfying as knowing that she was expelling energy in a healthy way. We jumped until it was time for bed. We jumped first thing in the morning, through the weekend and into this week!

The whole experience led me to ask myself: Is Izzy reacting to the novelty of an exciting gift, or the elation that comes with discovering the fun in something so simple?

We jump from activity to activity, passing each day while keeping our eye on the schedule for the next. We indulge and are constantly in search of the latest that technology has to offer. In doing so, we lose track of the simple pleasures like jumping rope, a classic childhood pastime that can even turn back time for any adult - when the physical act of jumping can lead to a spiritual jump for joy. I feel that it's moments like these that  parents and children alike get the most clarity. We do not embrace the novelty of the present, but instead, we embrace the novelty of bringing back a pleasure from the past. Our inner joy is awakened by feet slapping on the pavement, fresh air filling our lungs and the pleasure of creating our own moment in time.

I am so grateful for the affirmation that it really is the little things in life that bring the most pleasure.

With love,
Mrs Darling

Mommy Chicest - Wendy Hirschberg Clurman

Image Courtesy of Wendy Hirschberg Clurman

In 1987, Wendy Hirschberg Clurman began her career at Seventeen magazine, rising to become the publication's Fashion Market Director. She would then go on to become the Fashion Director (market) at Vogue Magazine, reporting directly to Anna Wintour. In September 2002, Wendy established her own freelance Fashion Consulting Business, working with clients such as Theory, Nili Lotan, Magaschoni, Kors by Michael Kors, Matthew Williamson, Anne Klein and Esteé Lauder. Today, Wendy is the VP Fashion Director of the Jones New York Brand under The Jones Group. Throughout the span of her career thus far, she has also taken on the roles of Wife to Michael and Mother to her beautiful daughters, Charlie and Piper. I began working for Wendy during the summer of 2005 when I was still an intern at Marie Claire Magazine. One of my first and fondest memories of Wendy is of her and her then baby daughter, Charlie, snuggling up before one of her consulting appointments. She looked incredibly chic, with the effortless glamour of having it all. I remember constantly being transfixed by the ease and grace of her balance between motherhood and maintaining a highly respected name within the fashion industry, which is in no small part due to her diligent work and undeniable talent. Wendy has been a source of inspiration to me from the day we met and that inspiration has stayed with me as I welcomed my own children into the world.

After founding Darling's Pixie Dust, I approached Wendy about checking in with her periodically about her thoughts on Motherhood and Style, to which she has graciously accepted. Our installments will be short, three question segments - the perfect dose for Mommies on the go. Enjoy!

With love,
Mrs. Darling

Image Courtesy of Wendy Hirschberg Clurman

MD: How has Motherhood changed you?

WHC: Motherhood caused a total shift in my priorities and what is important to me. It puts everything in perspective - Nothing is more important to me than my husband and children and spending time with them.

MD: What is your day-to-day Pixie Dust?

WHC: Cappuccinos and my assistants keep me sane and balanced!

MD: What is your biggest advice to Mothers for maintaining their Chic Card while balancing life and Motherhood?

WHC: Find what looks good on you and stick to a uniform. For me - It's skinny pants, with a blazer and soft shirting. Just because something looks good on your mommy friend, may not be the case for you.

*Stay tuned for more Q&A with Wendy in the coming months!

A Darling End of Summer Dinner

For the past six weeks, Mr. Darling and I have done what most young couples AND their respective parents dread the most: we moved back home.  - I should quickly state that this "dread" merely stems from the common notion that a married couple with children and man's best friend in tow should be established in their own home.

Nevertheless, we set up camp within the walls of my childhood home and I have to say that there is no doubt in my mind that my parents are well on their way to Sainthood. They have been gracious and loving hosts to our family as Mr. Darling completed his OB/GYN rotation over these past several weeks at my hometown Hospital. By opening up their home to us, my parents allowed our family to remain whole instead of enduring another separation. In return, Lola and Pop (their grandparents titles) opened themselves up all over again to every manner of early childhood trials and tribulations in addition to the daily joys of being with their grandchildren. My dad often remarked that this time around was much more enjoyable, because as grandparents, at the end of the day, after they had indulged the children's every whim, they could hand them back to their parents. As a grandparent, it's all about pleasure. I noticed that even with the most tedious of chores, my parents found delight in sharing each moment with my babies.

There was one evening when my mother was folding a mountain of laundry. I was in the process of ordering my daughter's  school uniforms and our little darling, feeling the boredom that comes from being five years old with idle hands, asked my mother if she could help her fold it all. It must be said that my mother has particular ways of doing things and I could already see the hesitation in her eyes before she, once again, indulged her granddaughter's wish. Sure enough, my little darling passed Lola's folding test with flying colors and when my mother asked her how she learned to fold so well, she looked straight into Lola's eyes, and with dramatic sincerity, said, "I just fold with my heart". My mother laughed so hard that tears streamed down her face. I thought she was going to need oxygen because she could barely catch her breath.   

I think perhaps one of the nicest parts about being home with my parents for six weeks, was that they too were once a young couple, overcoming the many obstacles that medical school brings. They could empathize with the complexity of our day to day life, especially after having lived it with us for several weeks.  They encouraged us every day that we were going to make it through, knowing how grueling this time can be and countlessly told us of their admiration for us as parents in the midst of our chaotic life. I can speak for Mr. Darling when I say that having them behind us, cheering all the way, has gotten us through some pretty stressful times this summer. 

As our time with them draws to an end, with the help of my brother, my mother and I decided to throw an end of summer dinner in celebration of not only our time spent together, but also the end of tripping over tiny shoes, jelly smeared finger prints all over my mother's custom made cabinets, and the occasional 4 am wake up call from the littlest darling. Our menu selections were chosen to highlight the very best of our basic summer fare favorites. Featured in this post are our recipes and photographs of our delicious dishes, tablescape and entertaining pieces.

THE MENU

Oysters with A Darling Mignonette

Nanny Gerties Turnip Salad

Crabmeat Gratin

Grilled Chilean Sea Bass with Fruit Salsa Over Tomato Puree

Steamed Broccoli With Toasted Walnuts

Fresh Fruit With a Berry Liqueur Glaze

Apricot Tarte

THE SERVEWARE

Vintage Limoges Oyster Plates From The Darling Collection

China: Limoges Clay, Bernadaud - Louvre Pattern

Vintage Glassbake Gratin Dishes From The Darling Collection

Spode Platter:  Mrs. Darling's College China

Italian Glass Serving Bowl and Pitcher: Massimo Lunardon - Bergdorf Goodman

Vintage Glassware: An heirloom from Mrs. Darling's Maternal Grandmother

Silver Place Settings: An heirloom from Mrs. Darling's Maternal Grandmother

Table Linens: Loretta Caponi, Florence, Italy (www.lorettacaponi.com)
Petite Vases/Place Card Holders: Flowers On Chestnut, Nantucket MA 

A DARLING MIGNONETTE

Yield: 1/2 Cup
Approximate Time: 15 minutes

2-3 very firm tomatoes, diced

1/2 jalapeño, thinly sliced

1 large shallot, diced

1 tablespoon fresh lime juice

Rind of 1 lime

salt and pepper to taste

2 drops of agave

1 splash of tequila

*Combine all ingredients and allow to macerate for an hour.
*Taste and correct seasoning before serving.

NANNY GERTIE'S TURNIP SALAD

Yield: 4-6 Servings

Approximate Time: 30 minutes

1-2 large Turnips

1 medium Vidalia Onion, thinly sliced

1 medium Watermelon Radish or 2-3 small regular Radishes, thinly sliced

 1 firm Tomato, seeded and diced (Optional)

1 tablespoon Parsley, chopped

Salt and Pepper to taste

1-2 Tablespoons Olive Oil

IN THE MORNING:

*Peel turnip and grate by hand or in a food processor

*Soak the first three ingredients in separate bowls of cold water. Refrigerate until you are ready to use them. This method ensures the crispiness of the vegetables.

*Just before serving, add the tomato (if desired), parsley, salt and pepper and drizzle the olive oil. 

*Taste and correct seasoning if needed

*Serve immediately  

CRABMEAT GRATIN

Yield: 4-6 Servings
Approximate Time: 60 minutes

3 cups Lump or Backfin Crabmeat

1/2 medium red onion diced

3 cloves garlic, minced

1 large tomato, diced

2 tablespoons parsley, coarsely chopped

1/3 cup Panko

Salt and Pepper to taste

1/2 teaspoon lemon thyme

1-2 teaspoons lemon juice  

5-6 tablespoons extra virgin olive oil

*Preheat oven to 375 degrees
*Saute the onions and garlic in 1-2 tablespoons extra virgin olive oil, until softened
*Add the diced tomato. Cook for 1 minute
*Season with salt and pepper to taste
*Add lemon thyme and lemon juice
*Cool the mixture slightly
*While mixture is cooling, mix the Panko, parsley and 1-2 tablespoons extra virgin olive oil
*Very lightly, mix the onion - tomato mixture with the crabmeat. You want to avoid compacting the mixture. Taste and adjust seasoning
*Spoon in to desired dish and sprinkle the top with the Panko mixture
*Bake for 6-7 minutes - until golden

GRILLED CHILEAN SEA BASS WITH FRUIT SALSA OVER TOMATO PUREE

Yield: 6 Servings

Approximate Time: 1 1/2 hours

 Six 7 ounce Chilean Sea Bass Fillets 

3 Kumato tomatoes, diced

1 firm mango, diced

1/2 red onion, diced

1tablespoon chopped scallions

1 16 ounce can diced tomatoes

2-3 cloves of garlic, minced

1 shallot diced

extra virgin olive oil

salt and pepper

Tomato Puree
*Saute garlic and shallots in 1 -2 tablespoons of extra virgin olive oil
*Add diced tomatoes and season with salt and pepper to taste.
*Simmer until slightly thickened, about 30 minutes
*Pour into food processor or blender and puree
*Using a fine strainer, strain the mixture into a bowl by pressing on the solids
*Discard the solids and set the bowl of strained mixture aside

Fruit Salsa
*Mix Kumato tomatoes, mango, red onion and scallions in a bowl
*Salt and pepper to taste
*Set mixture aside

Grilled Chilean Sea Bass
*Lightly drizzle the fish fillets with extra virgin olive oil and sprinkle with salt and pepper
*Heat a griddled cast iron pan on stovetop under medium heat
*Once the pan is very hot, sear fish on each side according to desired doneness

Assembly
*Pour 1/4 cup of tomato puree in the middle of your desired dinner plate
*Top with salsa
*Gently place fish over salsa and serve

STEAMED BROCCOLI WITH TOASTED WALNUTS

Yield: 6 Servings
Approximate Time: 30 minutes

2 large heads of broccoli, cut into segments

4 cloves of garlic, sliced or crushed

1/4 cup walnut oil

salt and pepper

1/2 cup shelled walnuts

*Preheat oven to 350 degrees
*Spread walnuts on a baking sheet and toast in the oven for 5 - 10 minutes, or until golden
*While the walnuts are still hot, drizzle with a tablespoon of the walnut oil and sprinkle with salt and pepper
*Set aside
*Fill a medium sized pot up to 1/3 of the way with water and bring to a boil
*Use a steamer insert filled with the separated heads of broccoli and place it over the boiling water
*Allow broccoli to steam over the pot until it changes to a bright green color (5-7 min), broccoli should still have a bite to it.
*Meanwhile, warm 2-3 tablespoons of walnut old and saute garlic until golden and set aside
*When broccoli is ready, transfer it into a large bowl. Season it with salt and pepper and add sautéed garlic.
*Drizzle with the remaining walnut oil and toss gently with the toasted walnuts
*Transfer to a serving bowl and serve

FRESH FRUIT WITH A BERRY LIQUEUR GLAZE
Approximate Time: 1 hour

Honeydew

Mango

Starfruit

Kiwi

Strawberries

Blackberries

Raspberries

Fresh Figs

1 jar cherry preserve

Rind of 1 lemon

1 cup of simple syrup (1 cup sugar and 3/4 cup water, simmer until dissolved. Cool before using)

1-2 tablespoons raspberry liqueur (*optional)

Berry Liqueur Glaze
*Mix preserve, simple syrup and lemon rind in a sauce pot
*Boil until thickened, skimming impurities or scum that rises to the surface. Remove from heat. Allow to cool slightly
*Add raspberry liqueur one tablespoon at a time (taste before you add the second tablespoon, if it suits your taste, stop at one tablespoon)

Assembly
*Cut each fruit according to your personal preference
*Layer fruit in a bowl of your choice
*Drizzle berry glaze 30 minutes before serving. This allows for the fruit to macerate in its own juices.

*Note: If liqueur is not used and glaze thickens too much when cooled, use a squeeze of orange or lemon juice with simple syrup to liquefy.

APRICOT TARTE

One 9 inch Tarte
Approximate Time: 1 1/2 hours

2 pounds ripe but firm Apricots, pitted and cut into quarters

Dough

1 1/14 cup all purpose flour

3 tablespoons sugar

1/8 teaspoon baking powder

5 tablespoons butter

1 egg yolk

2 tablespoons water

*Combine yolk and water and set aside
*Combine dry ingredients in a large mixing bowl
*Cut in the butter until it is the size of peas
*Add yolk and water mixture until it comes together
*Gather into a ball and wrap in plastic
*Allow to rest in the refrigerator for 1 hour. (Before using, allow to come back to room temperature)
*Roll out dough into a 10 inch round and drape over a buttered tart pan
*Press dough against the bottom and sides of the pan
*Cut top and chill while you prepare the filling

Filling

1 egg and 1 egg yolk

2 tablespoons of sugar

1/2 teaspoon of almond extract

1/4 teaspoon baking powder

2 tablespoons all purpose flour

2 tablespoons melted butter

*Beat egg, yolk, sugar and almond extract in a kitchen mixer
*Add flour, baking powder and melted butter
*Mix until well blended

*Preheat oven to 375 degrees
*Spread filling on the bottom of the tart pan. It will be thin.
*Arrange the apricots over the filling, cut side up, covering the entire bottom
*Bake for 30 minutes or until golden and allow to cool
*Sprinkle with powdered sugar just before serving



I've come to find that when entertaining for a larger group, a simple menu is best, but when you have a small group of six or less, one has more flexibility to play with a more complex menu and accompany the dishes with more meaningful serveware. This dinner's serveware has a lot of meaning to me as it was collected from the time I was fifteen years old to present day at twenty-eight. My mother started my Hope Chest for me when I was fifteen and through out the years we have each added to its contents. Our Darling End of Summer Dinner was the very first time we used the Loretta Caponi table linens that I had purchased at the age of twenty in the beautiful city of Florence when I visited with my art history class while studying abroad in London.


I hope you enjoy this post as much as I enjoyed creating it with my mother. It was an incredible experience to entertain with her, even though it was just for our little family. There was so much love and laughter (a few disagreements of course) and even though the plates have been cleared and the linens laundered, we will forever share the memories of not only cooking in the same kitchen, but the six weeks where we got to intertwine our lives ... both of us mothers ... both of us friends. We hope that you will try one, two or all of these recipes!

With love,
Mrs. Darling

My favorite oyster plates - my mother and I share them. We found them together while antiquing last summer.

Izzy Darling's very first oyster! It was not well received, but the most important thing was that it TRIED it! 

Loretta Caponi Table Linens

Our latest summer find - Vintage Glassbake gratin dishes! They are displayed on the Spode china that I chose for my first college apartment. One of the best things about going home is finding items from your past! 

How much fun is this pitcher? We named the crab Cecil!

Hello Cecil!

These glass vases/place card holders were an amazing find from Flowers on Chestnut, a fabulous Nantucket florist and gift shop. They have everything you need when creating a unique, yet quiet tablescape with flowers. 

Our table before the guests of honor were seated

Weekly PD: Tot-tails - A Little Darling's Libation

The Fizzy Izzy (cantaloupe or honeydew alternative) in my Grandmother's Vintage Port Glasses

Good Lord, it has been a week!!  Through out these past five days, I have found a new sense of appreciation for the end of the day. Not only does it bring the dawn of another, it also brings cocktail hour. Most of the time this involves the enjoyment of a true cocktail or sometimes, a cheery sparkling water infused with orange and rosemary, or a floral tea.  Cocktail hour in the Darling home typically begins when the children are asleep, however, this week we found that there was another person in need of a special treat at the end of the day.  This week's Pixie Dust came in the form of a Little Darling libation.

The littlest darling is currently a limit pushing enthusiast. Let me illustrate his newly appointed title: He takes the "one more step" ...   he presses every button..."If he screams one more time, I'll lose it" ...  and he gets his tiny little hands on everything he ought not ..."Darling!! Don't touch that!!"

I know that this is completely normal for his age (according to our pediatrician and experience) but for heaven's sake, the boy won't quit! There is a reason babies are so darn cute... it's so their parents won't bring them back to Costco, as our daughter frequently points out, to her, he came from Costco.

BRING ON THE COCKTAILS!!!

I do believe that these are the years that we need to cherish. I'm experiencing for myself that they pass in the blink of an eye, but at the end of the day, when Mommy is raw with frustration, she just needs a sweet kiss from the good old fruit of the vine. (From you too, Darling!) -- I began to think of my daughter... what must she be feeling amidst the chaos that is rocking her former only-child world? -- And I thought....she needs a ritual... a treat that only she is allowed to enjoy... in peace.

Our darling daughter has been very patient with her brother, while he relentlessly pinched her face and pulled her hair (which is an absolute No-No ...  something we are trying very hard to convey). This past Tuesday evening, I was remembering the days when I was allowed to have a Shirley Temple. I was dressed, pressed, and alight with the feeling that I was a cut above babies ... a big girl ... one with my grown up parental units. I knew that this was a feeling that our daughter would eat up.  I had the idea of pureeing a very ripe cantaloupe and honeydew in order to make her a healthier version of my beloved Shirley Temple - something she could enjoy after dinner when her brother went to bed.

We didn't want to promote alcohol consumption to our five year old so we refrained from beginning our adult cocktail hour and using our playful term, "Tot-Tails".  I named the kiddie libation "The Fizzy Izzy" and we each enjoyed a tiny glass of the sweet refreshment for dessert.  It was a huge hit. Our daughter clasped her hands with joy as she saw the "fancy" glasses coming toward her on a tray -- and as our darling smacked her lips in delight she said, "Mmm... We should make this for Bruder when he learns to use gentle hands." I'll take her advice on that one!  

With love,

Mrs. Darling

THE FIZZY IZZY

1very ripe Cantaloupe or Honeydew

1 lime, juiced

1/4 cup sparkling water or club soda

*Cut Cantaloupe or Honeydew into chunks

*Put in food processor or blender and puree until smooth

*Pour into a very fine strainer- a Chinois is perfect if you have it - over a pitcher or bowl

*Skim any froth or impurities that rise to the surface

*Add lime juice a tablespoon at a time and stir, tasting each time for desired proportions.

*Add sparkling water or club soda

*Chill before serving

Taste Test

Mrs Darling Gets Dressed: Running In Heels

It was time for a statement shoe -- well -- there was a strong desire for a statement shoe. According to Mr. Darling, it's never really time to purchase shoes of any kind until what you have is completely falling apart... and maybe not even then. I fully respect his practicality, however, practicality often takes a back seat to passion when it comes to a shoe lover's vision.

My mother and I were having a girls afternoon out with the Little Darling's in tow and our favorite department store was having a sale. We ran straight for the shoe department. As we admired the latest footwear and combed through the sale racks, we found a few, very well priced must haves. Then -- sitting right in front of me, as if pulsating with divine light, there they were, the perfect statement shoe for a care free summer night. They were bright, bold, completely outside my stylistic comfort zone, and had heels like skyscrapers. They were the creation of the fabulous Brian Atwood and they were exactly what I had been wanting. I scooped them up and quickly asked the sales associate for the mate. As I slipped them on and buckled the ankle strap,  a series of outfits flashed before my eyes and I immediately knew that these tootsies had found their wild weekend getaway from reality. (Something every Mommy needs from time to time).

In the meantime, despite the fact that they were never left alone, this is what had been happening: Our darling daughter had made a stiletto pile of her own to try on and as I persuaded her to look with her eyes and not with her hands, her baby brother decided that the new collection of Valentino studded footwear needed a few Cheerios in each shoe (Ah, the joys of shopping with children). My mother lovingly took charge while I had been trying on the objects of my desire. I walked up to her, shoes adorning feet and she admired the radical-chic look: They look great - I love them ... but they're so high! You have two children. When are you ever going to wear them? How are you going to walk in them?

As I explained to her that these shoes would be reserved for date and girls nights out only, the littlest darling took off running. He ran through the shoe department and into Contemporary Wear.  My immediate reaction was to run after him, Brian Atwood shoes and all. While my mother and daughter held down the fort of shoes, I chased and caught him before he could scramble behind the legs of a mannequin who, even in her state of blissfully unaware plaster, would no doubt mind being reduced to Humpty Dumpty.

 I scooped him up and walked back over to my mom, the darling banshee sitting restlessly on my hip and my statement shoes clicking proudly on the ground.  When I reached her, my mother's smile matched my own. "Well, I guess that answers that," she said. "I suppose they are comfortable". Very - was my response. It was then that we both broke out in laughter. My inner fashionista was giddy.

This Mrs. may have had two children, she may not always manage to look chipper and fresh but give her a pair of six inch heels and see her run like she's never missed a day in stilettos.

With love,
Mrs. Darling

Polar Opposites

My children are night and day. One would think I would have come to this realization months ago, but the fact is, the truth comes in waves of tiny epiphanies.

For example, let's compare a typical Manhattan stroll while visiting my parents in the city.
Age of Comparison: 16 months
Time of Epiphany: Two Saturdays ago at 3:30 pm

While our daughter was once happy to be strolled along Madison Avenue, taking in the store fronts and  terribly chic pedestrians passing on the street, her baby brother refused to have anything to do with his four wheels of luxury and proceeded to tear down the avenue at breakneck speed. The more grates (the bane of his sister's manhattan existence) the better. It was all I could do to get him to hold my hand!

Ah ha! There is was ... the Thousandth epiphany.

My children are not of the same mold.
My children are not of the same mold.
My children are not of the same mold.

Saying the above three times fast is not a difficult feat. What is, however, is the acceptance of that phrase and afterwards, adapting to each child's difference. I often wonder if acceptance and flexibility are harder for me because we have almost four years between our children. Would it have been easier if I have had them closer together?

My gut tells me: Hell NO! Girl, you would have had double the diapers, triple the amount of sippies and Boon spoons and quadruple the amount of "Mama" screams in a single day. - I still wonder though - which is a complete waste of time. As Mr. Darling often points out, there's no going back now!

True Darling, but try rationalizing with my old friend, Mommy Guilt. Let me know how well that one sits. She weighs on my shoulder, telling me, "You had so much more patience the last time around Dearie" and "Well Darling, if you spent as much time with your second as you did with your first then 'X' wouldn't be happening".

My rational mind says that this is ridiculous. My heart agrees with Mommy Guilt.

I wish I had advice to give on this subject, but in all honesty, I'm still trying to work this little ditty out. From what I'm discovering, the mommy guilt never manages to go away completely, and despite the trials that the differences can bring, they are far outweighed by the moments that my Little Darlings laugh, the sound is exactly the same ... pure magic, or when my son squeals with delight upon seeing his sister come down the stairs in the morning ... heart melted, or even when I see them both in the reflection of my rear view mirror - they are asleep and their expressions are identical ... weight lifted.

While I yearn for the day of complete mastery over parenting two totally different children, I am thankful for the moments that I can see and accept their differences and revel in the moments that they share.

With love,
Mrs. Darling

Weekly Pixie Dust

After an emotional week, I was finally able to sit down this morning and come to grips with everything. What started out as a typical week in the Darling home, ended up turning into a week of loss, pain, and questions.  Our puppy Gretta Bel passed away unexpectedly as a result of a tragic accident. She felt no pain as she died instantly.

It is never easy to say farewell to such a faithful companion, as a dog is to a family, but what was most difficult was helping our five year old daughter to understand it all. Despite her surprising composure, she naturally had a lot of trouble processing the loss of her dear puppy dog.

Our little family of four has been blessed time and time and again with the love and support of not only our family but also our friends as well. This week, we have received so much love from so many that our hearts, despite the breaking that comes with grief, are filled to the brim. The children's books, phone calls and cards have helped our family, especially our daughter, to heal.

The love of our family and friends has been more than enough to carry us through this week, but our specific Pixie Dust comes in the form of two children's books that have helped our daughter during bedtime, when she misses our Gretta the most. They are entitled, "I'll Always Love You" by Hans Wilhelm and "Dog Heaven" by Cynthia Rylant.

Mr. Darling and I highly recommend them to anyone with children who has lost a beloved pet. We are looking forward to a restful weekend, the beginning of a new week, a new adventure and a new outlook on life - remembering the importance of loving with each breath and all of your heart.

With love,
Mrs. Darling

Gretta Bel Darling

 Gretta Bel On Our Most Recent Camping Trip

The Darling Family is sad to report that our sweet dog Gretta Bel passed away yesterday evening. We are completely devastated. She was Mr. Darling's and my very first baby - the first leaf of our family tree.

I can still remember the day we brought her home just a couple of weeks after our wedding.

I remember how she used to perch on the edge of the sofa, standing watch over our daughter when she was just a newborn as she rocked in her baby swing.

Gretta and her sister Sailor were peas in a pod. Mr. Darling and I always called them bookends because they often slept in mirror images of each other. She and Sailor got me through three deployments, countless training trips and late nights while Mr. Darling was studying. She loved to snuggle up in blankets and her favorite lovey was her pink stuffed bunny - a gift from her Nana. She gave love and joy every day of her life.

I will miss the dual tinkling of collars as our pups ran together ... and it's still unthinkable that I will never call out: "Girls! Come here Girlies!" again.

We bundled her up in a soft pink blanket and gently carried her to her resting place. Our daughter drew her a picture of our family so that she would always have us with her. - I was completely astounded by the depth of our five year old's understanding of what was going on, not to mention her composure and the tenderness of her thoughts and questions. - As we placed a piece of slate over her grave, she asked, "But how will Gretta be able to come out when she's not dead anymore?" To which I responded by sitting her down and explaining that our Gretta girl would not be coming out. - That when someone is dead, their body rests at peace and does not move again. She accepted this with a few more tears and then asked if she could come and visit her as often as she would like. Yes, of course, was both Mr. Darling's and my immediate response.

Sailor sat by Gretta the whole time. Mr. Darling insisted that we allow her to say goodbye. He felt that it was important for Sailor to be with her so that she wouldn't be confused as to where Gretta had gone. I deeply admire and appreciate his presence of mind at that moment because I truly believe it helped her. She absolutely knew that her sister was no longer by her side.

As I kissed my girl goodbye one last time, my heart ached for every cross reprimand, though I know she lived a happy puppy life right up until the moment she died.

We loved her from the second we laid eyes on her and we will love her still, though she has now been laid to rest.

Our hearts are broken for the sudden loss of our beautiful girl, but as we told our Darling Daughter, she is in Heaven - eating white American Cheese (her favorite treat), running through grassy fields (her favorite activity) and taking forever to go potty (typical Gretta Bel).

Sleep in peace sweet puppy of ours. You will live in our hearts forever and always.

With love,
Mommy, Daddy, Sissy, Brubby and Sailor

The Pacifier "Situation"

The Paci Hub 

Why is it that everyone seems to have an opinion on "The Pacifier Situation"? My youngest Darling is a paci man. My immediate reaction to his affinity for the paci (or plug as his darling sister once called it) was: Oh! Thank God!

Both of my children were avid nursers and milk-aholics. This is any nursing mother's dream, however, my son took it to a whole new level. He nursed every fifteen minutes from the end of his last feeding and each feeding was no less than thirty minutes long. I never had to explain his initial nickname: The Tick.When my daughter was born I refused to introduce her to a pacifier. I was against her becoming dependent on something other than nursing to soothe her. That anti-paci stance lasted only a matter of hours. Birth, nursing and welcoming a baby is exciting and wonderful but it is also exhausting! As much as you want to bond with your baby, there are times when a mommy just needs a moment or twenty to herself. Our daughter would have nothing to do with a pacifier but then became enamored with her thumb and when our son was born I didn't have any hesitations. After we got a consistently good latch while nursing, he and his pacifier were given an immediate introduction. This was the start of a love affair that has been going on for the past sixteen months. Through out that time, many people have had an open opinion about it. It sounds something like this: Why do you allow him to have it whenever he wants it? You know, if you allow this to continue, the next thing he'll have in there is a cigarette. You are setting yourself up for disaster. You are making a mistake.

I am not persuaded by ridicule or any one's - no matter how well meant - opinion on the subject. My son is not a self soother and I am behind anything (within reason) that provides him that comfort. I feel, that as long as my pediatrician and our family dentist are on board, I'm good to go (which they are). My advice to Mommies of a similar mindset: Listen to your instincts and do what YOU feel is best for your child. At the end of the day, that is all that matters.

If my son needs braces, in my mind, so be it ... I had them too.  If he clings to the paci until we need to create a method of withdrawal, fine! If he is comforted by it until the age of three, no problem. The ONLY issue I have with the blasted thing is that he calls it, "Mama" ... but that's a whole other post. For now, I'm at peace with not only my decision to allow my son to have his paci on demand, but also the silence of a soothed baby.

With love,
Mrs. Darling